Friday, August 31, 2012

Yo, I'm 80

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Making a strong declaration with a confident tone is an admirable and respectable action that isn’t done that frequently.  It extends beyond the words spoken and displays the strong conviction and belief an individual has in an idea and in themselves.  How often have you heard someone inflect their voice at the end of their speech indicating uncertainty?  I know that the latter happens far more often (see what I did there?).  So what leads people to this confident state of being where a statement can be made without feeling an ounce of doubt?

I believe that having a positive attitude regarding yourself and your position in life, whatever it may be, leads to a more confident disposition, more fulfilling experiences, and a generally happier time on this earth.  If you can embrace who you are, where you came from, and what you stand for then everything else appears to be much clearer.  It becomes easier to take risks confidently and disregard the consequences of failure.

This idea sort of revealed itself to me a few days ago at a public library.  I am currently without an internet connection in my new apartment, and so I have been venturing the hundred steps or so to the local library (great location, I know) nearly every day.  While I was using far more than my fair share of bandwidth (I have yet to obtain my library card), I noticed something.  An elderly gentleman gingerly made his way through the stacks and carefully took a seat near the Large Print shelf.  What caught my attention was the baseball cap he had on.  It was plain gray except for the baby blue lettering on the front, above the brim.  It read, “Yo, I’m 80.”

I was excited in an instant.  Here was someone that just made an incredible first impression on me by doing nothing more than feature a strong idea on his attire.  As soon as I read the enlivening expression I imagined this man saying it to someone.  I imagined him saying it as though he were brushing off some insignificant mishap, justifying his knowledge and wisdom, or just introducing himself (after an unexpected, hip handshake) and making a strong impression.  In any instance, the statement sends the message that this guy knows who he is, and he is proud of it (maybe even cocky…).

Some people might say a confident move is made when you believe what you say or do.  I realized that a true confident move occurs when you say or do what you believe.  This guy believed he and his age were awesome and he expressed it.  Once you understand yourself and acknowledge your strengths and accept your shortcomings (which you might soon turn into strengths) and take a positive view of them, you’ll know and believe yourself.  Everything you do from that point will exude confidence because it comes from the internal belief.

Who are you?  Figure it out and believe it!  Be bold!

Yo, I’m 22!

Bam.

Tuesday, July 24, 2012

The Opposition Network: Your Key To Achievement

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Have you ever accomplished something that required you to put forth great amounts of effort?  I’m sure you have.  Have you ever seen someone else post-triumph?  I’m sure you have seen that.  In the moments after achievement one can look back at the road to victory.  I’m sure you have thought about how you made it to that winning moment, or have seen a glimpse of another’s path to success. 

The picture that comes to mind is someone accepting an award or being commemorated.  Traditionally a few words are offered by the recipient of the recognition.  These are most often words of thanks that are directed toward teammates, mentors, soul mates, coaches, family, friends, co-workers or other members of their support network.  These are people that have helped to bring the individual to new heights by providing emotional strength, bestowing knowledge, offering guidance, collaborating, motivating, inspiring, and caring. 

I believe this network is very important in aiding an individual’s pursuits, but I believe that a different network creates a far superior desire and motivation for success. 

I like to call the other group the opposition network.

The opposition network is filled with naysayers, fierce competitors, disapproving individuals, and those dishing out the cold hard truth.  It is a network that mines deep within your soul and starts a fire that emits sparks of doubt, pain, punishment and fear that reach every part of your being.  In response to this the body overpowers the flames and infuses elements of desire, meaning, drive, purpose and justice.    

Although it is powerful, the support network will not allow you to reach your full potential.  I see the support network as being a set of individuals with positive outlooks; these outlooks can delude them and the individual they are supporting.  There seems to be a lack of truth and reality in this network.  That is where the opposition network comes in.

The opposition network completes the picture, offering a clear view.  It enhances purpose and motivation.  It gives you someone to prove wrong, others to compete against and critics to learn from.  It is a relentless force that can push you to the limits and in turn reach greatness. 

In an effort to build this network, which I highly suggest considering the benefits, try to:

Pinpoint Competitors
A competitor will keep you on your toes, offer you a way to measure yourself, and push you to perform at your best.  This competition can range from a friendly contest to an intense rivalry in which there is a single focus on outdoing the other in a quest to be number one.

Find The Naysayers
Listen closely to find those around you that either do not believe in you or believe in what you are pursuing.  Use this as motivation to show them you CAN and to prove the worthiness of your pursuits.

Seek The Truth
In an effort to develop, you need to be aware of your strengths and weaknesses.  You need to know the ins and outs of your efforts and the variables present in your environment.  Find the people that will offer you the truth without regard for your feelings.  The raw information will be the feedback necessary to focus your attention on areas that need improvement. 

Finding the optimum balance between your support and opposition will give you the best chance for success.  

Use the opposition!

Tuesday, June 26, 2012

Problems Make The World Go Round

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People have needs.

If you’re having trouble in the love department then you may have just made a very narrow conclusion regarding that last statement.  Seriously though, people have a wide variety of needs; these needs must be met in order for quality lives to be led.  Maslow’s hierarchy is a perfect outline of the tangible and intangible needs that individuals have.

When needs, or even wants, are not met, problems arise.  There has to be effort exerted to address these problems. 

Problems can be big or small (#firstworldproblems).  Only having creamy peanut butter in the house when you’re craving crunchy peanut butter is still a problem even if just slightly.  More difficult problems include relationship trouble, financial hardships and health and safety issues.  

For each problem there is a solution, or at least a pursuit of a solution.

For all the negatives that problems bring I think there are some important positives as well. 

One positive is the fact that problems provide purpose (a lot of alliteration going on right there).  When a problem arises, action has to be taken to solve it.  Essentially they give us things to do.  What would we do if there was nothing to do (Paradox)?  What would we do if there were no problems?  Think of it this way.  Firefighters fight fire, but if there ceased to be any fires they would have nothing to do.

Think of any profession and it is tied to solving a problem stemming from some need.  A doctor solves problems related to illness and injury because people have a need to be healthy.  An advertising executive creatively promotes products and services for particular companies which seek to fulfill some need for their customers.   

Problems that arise for you may give you purpose to solve them.  Your problems may give others purpose as well, and vice versa. 

When you look at the world this way, as a constant stream of problems and solutions of various magnitudes, things seem to make a little more sense. 

A second positive is the development that occurs when you face and respond to troubles.  Solving problems helps you grow and learn; it shapes you. 

The next time you face a problem just remember that it is a piece to the puzzle of life and contributes to the functioning of the world.  Embrace it, and solve it!

Boom!

Thursday, May 31, 2012

What You Need To Know About Your Eyes

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Eyes are everywhere.  There are two of them atop us humans.  They somehow turn light into electro-chemical signals (I’m no scientist) that are interpreted by our brain to give us vision.  They allow us to see.  Sight is very valuable and it’s important to remember a few things about it (I’ll get to those later). 

This morning I had an eye exam at 8:15 AM.  I am a morning person (crazy I know, and I don’t drink coffee either) and decided that I wanted to schedule the appointment early in the day; I was surprised and delighted to hear that the office opens at 7:00 AM (yes, they’re crazy too).

I do look pretty handsome in my glasses, but I prefer contacts and needed an eye exam in order to purchase another supply of them.  After about twenty minutes of “Qs,” “Bs,” “Cs,” and “Ss” in the patients’ leather throne I was ready to go home with my brand new prescription.  Just as I was ready to slide out of the chair, I was offered the option of pupil dilation which would allow the doctor to most effectively inspect my eyes for any problems.  I thought about it for a moment, and then agreed.  A little discomfort in order to maintain good health is definitely worth it. 

After the doctor surveyed my eyes I was free to go.  There were no problems.  As I was leaving, the doctor said, “Did you bring sunglasses?”  I replied, “Why? Do I need them.”  He answered, “You might. You might.”  As he said that he pulled a rolled up piece of dark plastic out of what appeared to be a film canister (I thought Kodak learned their lesson already).  He handed me a pair of disposable sunglasses that didn’t have temple arms!  They just unroll and stick to your face. 

As I walked outside the sun was a little overbearing and I needed the disposable protection.  I was squinting until I put the glasses on.  With them I could have played a role in the Matrix, traveled back in time and replaced Tom Cruise in Top Gun, protected the President of America, or won an international poker tournament.  Instead, I just quietly hummed Cory Hart’s 1980s hit single, Sunglasses at Night, and drove home.

Do you see what I mean?
I thought about the slight blurriness and sensitivity that the dilation caused and realized that for the most part I take for granted the ability to see.  I thought about vision and I came up with these characteristics of and things to remember about sight:

Eye Contact Is Important
Have you ever gazed into someone’s eyes before?  In that moment you feel one of the deepest connections.  It is you and them.  The rest of the world is secondary.  Some people are uncomfortable with too much eye contact, but usually because it’s with someone they don’t know very well or don’t want to know very well.  When you make eye contact, you not only connect with sight, but with soul.  I feel that through the eyes you can see who a person is and they can see who you are (which is good unless your eyes are dilated and you come off as a demon or drug addict).  Remember to give the proper amount of attention, through eye contact, to the individuals you want to be closest to. 

Right before I wrote this post I was on my bike and passed a beautiful young woman walking in the opposite direction.  We made eye contact and smiled.  About five seconds after, I turned my head back to look again, and she was doing the same.  That’s called the mutual double-take or MDT!  I know that extra moment of eye contact sent a message of interest and created a deeper connection, even if just for a moment. 

The Eyes Don’t See Everything
Spin around 360 degrees with your eyes open and there are unlimited places for your eyes to wander.  There is a lot that you can see, but a lot goes unseen.  This can either be a good thing or a bad thing.  It is bad in the sense that others may not notice some things you want them to, like writing great blog posts.  Remember to adjust for this by drawing attention to those things; wisely choose the things you want noticed and the way in which you make them seen.  Also, like the others, you won’t see everything so it is important to be as cognizant as possible. 

On the other hand, the eyes’ failure to catch things can be an advantage.  Did I spill beer all over a lady a few days into my job at a new restaurant?  Yes.  Did a lot of people in the room see it?  No.  In that particular area of the restaurant there were more people that didn’t see it than did.  People I could have sworn saw it didn’t.  Knowing this helps you to accept mistakes and move on without worrying.  If by chance a lot of people do see you make a mistake it’ll be only a matter of minutes before their mind wanders to other thoughts.

Your Eyes Connect You To The World
Sight is one of the five senses.  It is literally one of the mediums that make you realize everything around you.  The world has a lot to offer so soak it all up.  Spend some extra time looking at the sky, landscapes, sunsets, artwork, architecture, people or whatever you want.  Look from new angles for new perspectives.  Use your eyes to discover. 

Appreciate sight and use it well!

Wink, bam!

Wednesday, May 30, 2012

Motivation by Visual Stimulation

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The other day I took a short drive to the local library and asked the librarian at the front desk where I could find The Great Gatsby.  She asked me who the author was, which puzzled me for a moment; I thought that kind of information was common knowledge for librarians.  Anyway, I responded with, "F. Scott Fitzgerald," and she led me to the hardcover version of the classic novel.  Within two days I had finished the book.  I'm the type of person that prefers movies over books although I do strive to read more, so reading a novel in such a short time is saying something.  It says that I was very motivated to read.       

The day before this library pick-up I had seen an advertisement for the upcoming Hollywood remake, The Great Gatsby, which will be starring Leonardo DiCaprio and Tobey Maguire.  I clicked on the image, which was laden with gold designs and “Gatsby” in fancy lettering.  I then watched the trailer for the film.  I was completely enthralled.  Seeing the vibrant images of the stylized 1920s, intense emotions on the characters faces, and glimpses of unfolding events made me very interested in not only the movie, but the story.  I have read and enjoyed the novel before, a few years ago, but I felt compelled to do it once again.  I had to go seek out the novel and read it.    

The powerful and thought provoking images motivated me by giving me a sense of the end result.  I knew the sorts of things the novel included and the type of experience I would have reading it.   

There have been a few other cases similar to this one, where I was motivated by images.  When I first saw images for the theatrical releases of both The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo and The Hunger Games I read the books within the week.

Another recent example unrelated to reading books (I’ve used a lot of those examples) would be my gardening venture.  I have recently planted some peanuts to grow my own plants.  I would most likely never have planted the peanuts had I not seen the images of peanut plants online.  Yes I searched for the images.  What can I say?  I love peanut butter!  I saw how feasible it is to grow them, and more importantly saw the resulting peanuts that grow beneath the soil.  I was intrigued.

How long before I can make peanut butter!?
If you have interest in something and can gain a sense of how something will be or how it will result then the motivation to act will follow.     

My interest in reading, and in peanuts (it sounds silly to be interested in peanuts) combined with the imagery that I encountered and sought out, led me to act. 

If you are looking for the motivation to do something then just look for powerful images or use your imagination to visualize your own ones that will push you to act. 

Another example, which is gaining a lot of popularity, is the social networking site, Pinterest, which is based on collections of images “pinned” by users; it contains a lot of motivating forces.  Whether you are interested in getting into shape, decorating your home, starting a garden, cooking, traveling, dressing nicely, playing sports etc., there are images throughout the site that can spark motivation to do those things!   

Find or create a motivating image to begin doing something that interests you!

Bam!

Monday, May 28, 2012

Baskets: Not Only For Easter, But Fitness Too

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As we age (this coming from a 21-year-old) our lives become busier and our time is tied up in many different activities; “activities” isn’t the best word to describe how the time is used though, considering it implies physical movement.  Our time is tied up mainly in mental pursuits.  Many people begin focusing on their work and spend countless hours each week physically inactive, hunched over their desks or in other life-draining positions.  The days of running around at recess, competing in sports, and actively “playing” in general have a tendency to slip away.  If an individual cannot set away time to partake in some sort of fun exercise, I feel sorry for them, but I believe they can still find ways to remain fit and active.

I am someone that takes physical fitness fairly seriously.  I try to make it into the gym at least two or three times a week, and I also run or bike a few times a week.  I know that as time goes on I will take on much more responsibility whether it be from work, from family, or any other facet of life that I have no power of foreseeing in the present.  With more responsibilities, carving out blocks of time for exercise will become more difficult.  I have realized this: 

Fitness is a lifestyle, not a trip to the gym. 

I’ve always heard this type of message, but only recently really thought about it.  Today I was shopping at my favorite grocery store… Wegmans!  In case you have never heard of it, a friend of mine, and fellow blogger, wrote a recent post about the magical grocery land.  Anyway, I walked in and realized that I only really needed about ten items or so, the essentials.  In choosing my “weapon of choice” in the battle through the aisles I decided on a basket rather than the large or small carts.  With each added item I could feel a little tension in my biceps, forearms, abs, and shoulders.  I was doing some light exercise!  When others weren’t looking I may have done a few curls and shrugs, no shame. 

It hit me that a little change like this in a very routine errand makes a positive difference in your overall fitness.  It might not help you reach maximum fitness goals in the way that an elliptical or set of free weights would, but small changes like this add up. 

I know that as I age I might not be able to fit in an hour or two at the gym as often as I’d like to, but that won’t stop me from maintaining an active lifestyle.  Making a bunch of small changes like this will be advantageous.

Some more minor changes that can aid fitness include:
  • Parking your car at the back of parking lots to maximize walking distances
  • Taking stairs over elevators (also walking up ‘down’ escalators if there is no crowd)
  • Sitting on a fitness ball instead of a chair
  • Standing as opposed to sitting when the opportunity presents itself

It is a matter of identifying things you do on a daily basis and figuring out how they can be done in a more physically active way without costing you too much of your time. 

I believe the other key to being fit is finding time for exercise.  If you have short amounts of time free, do a short workout, but if it is too difficult then these small changes are a step in the right direction. 

As I go into the future I’ll be working on maintaining time for exercise and making fit-changes.  My ultimate, long term fitness goal is to be able to run at least 2 miles straight and do around fifty push-ups when I am at the ripe old age of 80.

Be fit!  However you can!

Boom!

Saturday, April 28, 2012

The Value of Handwritten Letters

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Yesterday I had a great surprise.

A hand written letter from one of my friends was waiting for me in my P.O. Box.  This is a friend that I haven't seen in many months, mainly because of the geographical distance between us.  She had planned on visiting me a few weekends ago, but some unfortunate events occurred which made the visit more suitable for another time.  Unable to visit, she sent me a handwritten letter to update me about things in her life and ask how I was doing.

I was really excited to see the surprise letter and even more excited to read it.  My friend could have easily contacted me via email, text, phone call, or through various social media channels.  Instead she chose the letter.  

A handwritten letter is a gesture that has great meaning and holds a lot of weight.  It reveals the effort that an individual is willing to put forth because of their respect or care for you.

The idea of handwritten letters or messages being more thoughtful and meaningful than other mediums is nothing new, but communication technology is growing exponentially and as each day passes the archaic practice of putting words on paper (recycled, of course) gains more power.  Anyone can communicate electronically, and everyone does, but writing by hand has been forgotten a bit and reclaiming it gives you a unique way to reach others.

If you want to make a bold statement, show someone you care, or stand out from the crowd then write a letter.  Put yourself in the shoes of the recipient.  When I do that I say, "Um yes!  Of course I want a handwritten letter.  The words on paper are like gold bricks carefully placed into an envelope-shaped treasure chest."  

It is a simple gesture that takes some time but means a lot.

Obviously some mediums are better than others in certain circumstances, but when the opportunity to write a letter arises, take it!

After I received the letter I responded with one of my own, and this blog post was hand written before typed.

Boom!