You Don’t Have To Wait Until Halloween To Be Something

wait for it...

When you’re young you’re often asked the question, “What do you want to be [when you grow up]?”  Once you reach a certain age the question becomes, “What do you do [for a living]?” 

This slight change in wording can alter your perception of everything, including yourself.  Somewhere along the line, the sense of passion, personality, and possibility has a tendency to fade away.  The original question that we often hear as youngsters, is centered around “us,” you and I as individuals.  It hints at a future in which you will “be” something, stand for something, and act purposefully.  The second question lacks the personality component that the first contains.  It hints at an existence where tasks are performed to sustain oneself and fails to acknowledge the core values driving those actions. 

Some people might say something to the contrary, proposing that doing is more important than being, by saying, “aren’t actions more important than words, and don’t your actions define who you are?”  I would say that yes, your actions are important.  They do define you in a sense; more precisely, they define the “you” that you become.  Our actions, though, are driven by who we are, which includes who we want to be.  Our actions are things that follow and result from those initial values and ideas.    

So obviously, who we “are” is important.

So to maintain that meaningful perception of ourselves and others I propose a few things:

• Think of yourself first as a collection of values, and meaningful ideas and then secondly as the things you do as a result

• Respond to inquiries about what you do by talking about who you are (your past, your interests, key personality traits, values, wants etc.) and then lead into the things you do (your profession, roles, functions, activities)

•  This doesn’t have to be a long drawn out story either

• Frame questions to others with the word “being” in mind; rather than asking, “what do you do?” which is very limiting, you can say, “tell me about yourself,” which will reveal qualities, characteristics, and reasons behind a person’s actions

“Steve, what do you do?”

(I could give a dull answer and then follow up with more information or…)

“Well, I really love working with people and enjoy being part of a creative process.  I have a strong interest in business, especially the strategies used to reach customers.  I am Assistant Account Executive at The Verdi Group, a marketing firm that helps clients gain strong customer and prospect response through the implementation of unique and powerful solutions.  I coordinate projects for clients, ensuring their timely, cost effective, and quality completion and successful implementation.” 

A couple of sentences at the beginning of the response gives some insight into who I am and why I am doing what I do. 

Using this perspective might even lead you to realize that what you are doing doesn't parallel who you are or who you want to be.    

Be something!

Since Halloween is right around the corner I have been hard at work brainstorming what I will be.  I’m going as some type of “duo” with my friend.  I thought I would share some of the best ideas:

• One of us with a t-shirt reading, “Legen,” the other, “Dary”

• One of us with a t-shirt reading, “Somebody, that you used to know,” and the other, “Somebody, that you’ll call… maybe”

• Prince William (dressed very preppy) and Prince Harry (no clothes needed!)

• Hockey player and coach with locks around our necks (NHL Lockout)

• Scientist and Scientologist

• iPhone 4S and iPhone 5 (both dressed in white, but one slightly taller than the other)

BOOm!

Diamonds Are Not Forever

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Do you feel that chill?  If you are one of my many readers hailing from the tropics, I do not mean the breeze flowing from the vent in your air-conditioned dwelling.  I am of course referring to the actual climate change occurring in the North-Eastern United States.  Winter is already creeping in on the fall, which has really only just arrived.  Sadly, this means that summer has passed.  It couldn't last forever, just like everything else.

The summer is always a wonderful season; it’s warm, bright, and full of adventure.  This year’s was even more of a treat thanks to all of the excitement of the 2012 Summer Olympic Games held in London.  In my opinion, the greatest moment of the games, beyond the games, would have to be the opening ceremony.  There are two main reasons.  First off, her majesty (is that really necessary when the next part of your title is “Queen”…) Queen Elizabeth II was escorted to the Olympic Games, via helicopter ride and then an adrenaline-fueled parachute jump, by none other than James Bond (cue the 007 spy theme).  Secondly, Sir Paul McCartney concluded the ceremony beautifully and powerfully with the Beatles’ hit “Hey Jude.”

The other day I was reminded of those two iconic components of British pop culture, James Bond and The Beatles.  October 5, 2012 marked the fiftieth anniversary of the release of the first James Bond film, Dr. No, and the Beatles’ debut single “Love Me Do.”  I was stunned to hear this very interesting and hard-to-believe fact.  Moments later my attention was grabbed by a trailer for the newest James Bond film, Skyfall.  My mind immediately began to wander and recall the fond memories of the countless 007 movies I have seen in the past.  My mind raced with characters, actors, gadgets, locales, and film titles.  Bond, James Bond, Connery, Brosnan, Carmen Electra, Pussy Galore, Aston Martin, grapple gun, jetpack, ski pole gun, Prague, Venice, the Bahamas, Goldfinger, The World Is Not Enough, From Russia With Love, Diamonds Are Forever.  Who doesn't love James Bond!? 

A few days after this surge in spy-related thought, the title Diamonds Are Forever still lingered.  I thought about that phrase for a while.  The words “diamond” and “forever” have been used together before.  The line, “A Diamond is Forever” was created in the 1950s by an advertising copy-writer working on the De Beers account.  It is definitely one of the most impactful and well-known tag lines in advertising history.  In my opinion, it perfectly and poetically represents the enduring physical characteristics of, and strong emotional bond (advertising at its best) created by a diamond. 

It is great copy-writing, but haven’t you ever heard of someone losing their diamond ring, or having a change of heart?  Boom!  Nothing is forever, not even a diamond.

                                          

Yes, some things last longer than others, but in the end nothing will last forever.  This includes things both material and immaterial.  The immaterial part includes ideas, emotions, and feelings.  Some might say that some very enduring things do exist; yes they do, but are they ever completely unchanged?  Change is something that always finds its way into life.  Sometimes it is positive change, sometimes it is negative change, and perhaps even neutral other times.  It is part of the natural ebb and flow.    

If you choose to take this view, you can enjoy more of life and worry about a lot less.

Diagnosis: Fuel-Pump Disorder

Last week I was feeling great (more than usual), and it seemed as though everything was going right.  I hadn't a worry in sight.  Then my car wouldn't start.  I was car-less from Friday at 2:00 p.m. to Tuesday at 5:00 p.m. as the mechanic replaced the fuel pump and then charged handsomely for it.  This problem came without warning and caused some disruption in my schedule.  I should have known all the good feelings couldn't last for long before something like this happened. 

I felt upset and depressed as Friday evening rolled around and I was sort of stranded; one unsuccessful turn of a key and there I was with a big 4,000 lb. problem in front of me.  My best bud was planning to visit that night, but I attempted to preempt the get-together because of a change in mood (I had better things to do like sulk over my misfortune).  Before my friend could respond to my negative expression, I retracted my previous statement and labeled it a lapse in judgment.  I quickly replied with something to the effect of, “scratch that, can’t wait to see you bud; tonight will be legendary.”  He showed up, and we had a blast!  I may not have forgotten about the car issue, but it sure didn't matter as much.

Experiencing a steady period of good fortune, then a low point, and then a high point soon after, made me realize something.  Diamonds are not forever— favorable situations cannot last as long as you’d like, but on the other hand troublesome or adverse periods do not last as long as you fear they might.

Understanding the transitory nature of life teaches us two lessons: 

1.  Embrace the good things, wholeheartedly, while they last.  Be grateful for your health and everything else you have, and cherish the people that are close to you.  Don’t take anything for granted.

2.  Don’t dwell on difficulties, negativities, or losses.  Their effects cannot last forever, especially if you work to overcome them.  As the famous saying goes, “this too shall pass.”

Bam.

The Joy of Competition

Image Source: Melody Burri, Messenger Post Media
What up!  In the zone right here!

This is the 21^st blog post I have written (I am patting myself on the back).  I had planned on the 21^st post to address and explain 21 Orchard, but given the ever-changing nature of the world (I sound so philosophical) the plans changed and that post will have to wait.  The change happened for a good reason though.

Saturday’s events were LEGEN… wait for it, I’ve obviously been watching way too much How I Met Your Mother… DARY!  Yes, like Barney I am very liberal with the use of the term “legendary,” but this account is still worth sharing.  The story begins with a flashback to this past Tuesday.  After a short a period of absence from the gym I went to pump some iron that night.  I did my usual chest and triceps workout, which is pretty exhausting and enough to make me want to devour a 30-gram protein bar in under a minute.  When I was finished, I didn’t leave, and I didn’t have the chocolaty peanut buttery bar in my hand ready for annihilation.  I wasn’t completely finished.  When I first registered at this YMCA I saw that there were a variety of exercise classes held each day that I had access to as a member (can you say VIP?).   This Tuesday I figured I would buckle down and participate in the core-workout class right after weight lifting.  I consider myself to be pretty athletic and felt prepared for this 25-minute session.  In short, it was definitely a workout and more than I expected.  I was using muscles that I haven’t probably ever used, and the rest periods were, well, there were none.  I felt great afterwards though!  It was an intense trip to the gym.  I woke up the next morning, but probably shouldn’t have.  For the next three days I was sorer than I have been in ages.  It felt like Ivan Drago had used my midsection as a punching bag for a half hour straight.  I know why my muscles were sore, but why were my ribs!?  Anyway, it was very uncomfortable, and during those days all I wanted to do was lay down (and watch How I Met Your Mother).

While I was in this state of recovery I was worried.  What was I worried about?  I felt like I wasn’t going to be able to compete in the 5K race that I had signed up for, which was to be held in a few short days.  I had dropped $20.00 for the race which would be my first of the kind.  I didn’t want the money to be lost, and I had been so excited to compete.  I enjoy going for runs, and I figured the race could be a lot of fun.  Also, it had been a while since I had been a part of a competition.  Fantasy football is definitely competitive, but it doesn’t have that physicality I need!  On Friday night I knew that there would be a game-time decision for this early-morning 5K.  I came home from work, ate, and went to bed early (my aching body needed only two things: protein and sleep).  I’d mention the exact time I hit the hay, but then I might be likened to a 70 year-old man; I will not stand for that!

I woke up on Saturday with enough time to make my decision.  Bam!  It was made!  I was doing this thing.  I woke up feeling refreshed, and ready to conquer the world.  I made it to the race location, received my number, and gathered with the rest of the runners.  I was there to compete and despite the sight of some very conditioned athletes, I was still pumped and ready to perform. 

I had my back-up iPod in hand, because my go-to iPod had died a few weeks back.  The aging iPod Mini in my grasp was an unreliable piece of audio equipment, but I was hoping it could last the race (more incentive to run fast).  Blondie’s Heart of Glass  was all queued up (I’m an 80s music fan) and ready to send some motivating vibes through my ears, but the iPod battery shut down immediately and the screen turned darker than night.  Seconds later the signal was given to start the race.  I started running, and I kept hold to the ounces of electrical circuitry that once brought me musical pleasure, but now was nothing more than a piece of junk weighing me down.

After 15 seconds I was in third place overall!  I told myself to start strong and feel the pace of the front-runners.  They were fast indeed!  I was soon passed by some sweaty bodies (so much for third), but after a while I felt like I was in a good position and moving at a decent pace.  The occasional runner passed me as I continued forward.  There were a lot of hills and I was definitely feeling it in my legs and lungs.  I still had the iPod in my hand and I wanted to get rid of it.  As I passed one of the volunteers on the road I lofted the mp3 player to him and said, between breaths, “You can have it!”  He looked at me strangely, but caught it and gave a nod of understanding.  Bam!  The worthless iPod was gone.  I would be able to sprint ahead feeling lighter than ever right?  In a dream world, yes.  In the real world, no.  It was nice having my hands free, but that didn’t mean much for the rest of my body.  There was a lot of road ahead and I had to maintain my pace.  I tucked the headphone jack into my waistband (they're decent headphones) and carried on.    

As I continued up and down the route (mostly up considering the long hills) I saw spectators on the side of the road.  They made positive and inspirational comments and held out cups of water for the runners!  I thought to myself, “This is awesome. I’ve only seen this kind of stuff on television.”  I wasn’t thirsty and wasn’t over heated, but I grabbed a cup of water and threw it back in my face and neck like a seasoned veteran.  I couldn’t pass it up.  I had to immerse myself in the experience.

After that brief splash of amusement, I realized there was still about a mile left.  After that “checkpoint” where I knew the distance, I was starting to struggle.  I asked two people on the side of the road how far the finish line was, but they apparently had no clue.  A handful of minutes passed and I was wondering how much longer I could hold out.  Then, I heard someone off to the right say, “Keep it up!  Only a hundred yards left.”  At that moment I thought to myself, “Whew!  Let’s finish this baby strong!”  I looked ahead, and I could see the finish line.  There were two men ahead of me, within striking distance!  I kicked it into sprint mode (as close to it as possible) and I saw the distance between myself and the other two runners lessen.  I was going to do it!  I had the adrenaline pumping and I managed to pass both of them.  I leaned forward as I crossed the finish line (a little dramatic in hindsight) and was elated to have had such a strong and successful push at the end.  I was done. 

I spent some time regaining my breath and took a seat on a curb.  A woman came up to me shortly after and said, “You’re just the man I’m looking for.  What’s your name?”  That happens to me all the time with random women (I wish).  Anyway!  Me.  Picture.  Newspaper.  Bam!  I don’t consider myself to be photogenic, but something about my final effort to the finish caught this woman’s eye, and she snapped the shot featured above.    

A little later I checked the finish times, and although a lot of individuals finished before me I placed 1^st in my age group (19-24)!  Success!  A few days prior I was struggling to straighten my torso, but in this moment I was a champ.              

The awards ceremony took place about an hour later.  I was so hungry at that point.  Much to my surprise, I had won not only a blue ribbon but a $10.00 gift certificate to a restaurant as well.  It happened to be a restaurant right near my apartment that I had wanted to try.  That was convenient.  The gyro I ended up having definitely hit the spot.

All in all it was a wonderful day.  I had an awesome experience, met some great people before and after the race, and gained some motivation to continue pushing my physical limits and enter more races and competitions in general.   

Compete!  It gives you a shot at winning, which is always a great feeling, and even if you don’t win, the experience is usually thrilling and filled with fun.  If you find yourself in a similar position that I did, uncertain about competing because of some reason (soreness), think about the wise words coined by some unknown advertising copywriter working for Nike and “just do it.”

Bam!

Yo, I'm 80

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Making a strong declaration with a confident tone is an admirable and respectable action that isn’t done that frequently.  It extends beyond the words spoken and displays the strong conviction and belief an individual has in an idea and in themselves.  How often have you heard someone inflect their voice at the end of their speech indicating uncertainty?  I know that the latter happens far more often (see what I did there?).  So what leads people to this confident state of being where a statement can be made without feeling an ounce of doubt?

I believe that having a positive attitude regarding yourself and your position in life, whatever it may be, leads to a more confident disposition, more fulfilling experiences, and a generally happier time on this earth.  If you can embrace who you are, where you came from, and what you stand for then everything else appears to be much clearer.  It becomes easier to take risks confidently and disregard the consequences of failure.

This idea sort of revealed itself to me a few days ago at a public library.  I am currently without an internet connection in my new apartment, and so I have been venturing the hundred steps or so to the local library (great location, I know) nearly every day.  While I was using far more than my fair share of bandwidth (I have yet to obtain my library card), I noticed something.  An elderly gentleman gingerly made his way through the stacks and carefully took a seat near the Large Print shelf.  What caught my attention was the baseball cap he had on.  It was plain gray except for the baby blue lettering on the front, above the brim.  It read, “Yo, I’m 80.”

I was excited in an instant.  Here was someone that just made an incredible first impression on me by doing nothing more than feature a strong idea on his attire.  As soon as I read the enlivening expression I imagined this man saying it to someone.  I imagined him saying it as though he were brushing off some insignificant mishap, justifying his knowledge and wisdom, or just introducing himself (after an unexpected, hip handshake) and making a strong impression.  In any instance, the statement sends the message that this guy knows who he is, and he is proud of it (maybe even cocky…).

Some people might say a confident move is made when you believe what you say or do.  I realized that a true confident move occurs when you say or do what you believe.  This guy believed he and his age were awesome and he expressed it.  Once you understand yourself and acknowledge your strengths and accept your shortcomings (which you might soon turn into strengths) and take a positive view of them, you’ll know and believe yourself.  Everything you do from that point will exude confidence because it comes from the internal belief.

Who are you?  Figure it out and believe it!  Be bold!

Yo, I’m 22!

Bam.

The Opposition Network: Your Key To Achievement

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Have you ever accomplished something that required you to put forth great amounts of effort?  I’m sure you have.  Have you ever seen someone else post-triumph?  I’m sure you have seen that.  In the moments after achievement one can look back at the road to victory.  I’m sure you have thought about how you made it to that winning moment, or have seen a glimpse of another’s path to success. 

The picture that comes to mind is someone accepting an award or being commemorated.  Traditionally a few words are offered by the recipient of the recognition.  These are most often words of thanks that are directed toward teammates, mentors, soul mates, coaches, family, friends, co-workers or other members of their support network.  These are people that have helped to bring the individual to new heights by providing emotional strength, bestowing knowledge, offering guidance, collaborating, motivating, inspiring, and caring. 

I believe this network is very important in aiding an individual’s pursuits, but I believe that a different network creates a far superior desire and motivation for success. 

I like to call the other group the opposition network.

The opposition network is filled with naysayers, fierce competitors, disapproving individuals, and those dishing out the cold hard truth.  It is a network that mines deep within your soul and starts a fire that emits sparks of doubt, pain, punishment and fear that reach every part of your being.  In response to this the body overpowers the flames and infuses elements of desire, meaning, drive, purpose and justice.    

Although it is powerful, the support network will not allow you to reach your full potential.  I see the support network as being a set of individuals with positive outlooks; these outlooks can delude them and the individual they are supporting.  There seems to be a lack of truth and reality in this network.  That is where the opposition network comes in.

The opposition network completes the picture, offering a clear view.  It enhances purpose and motivation.  It gives you someone to prove wrong, others to compete against and critics to learn from.  It is a relentless force that can push you to the limits and in turn reach greatness. 

In an effort to build this network, which I highly suggest considering the benefits, try to:

Pinpoint Competitors

A competitor will keep you on your toes, offer you a way to measure yourself, and push you to perform at your best.  This competition can range from a friendly contest to an intense rivalry in which there is a single focus on outdoing the other in a quest to be number one.

Find The Naysayers

Listen closely to find those around you that either do not believe in you or believe in what you are pursuing.  Use this as motivation to show them you CAN and to prove the worthiness of your pursuits.

Seek The Truth

In an effort to develop, you need to be aware of your strengths and weaknesses.  You need to know the ins and outs of your efforts and the variables present in your environment.  Find the people that will offer you the truth without regard for your feelings.  The raw information will be the feedback necessary to focus your attention on areas that need improvement. 

Finding the optimum balance between your support and opposition will give you the best chance for success.  

Use the opposition!

Problems Make The World Go Round

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People have needs.

If you’re having trouble in the love department then you may have just made a very narrow conclusion regarding that last statement.  Seriously though, people have a wide variety of needs; these needs must be met in order for quality lives to be led.  Maslow’s hierarchy is a perfect outline of the tangible and intangible needs that individuals have.

When needs, or even wants, are not met, problems arise.  There has to be effort exerted to address these problems. 

Problems can be big or small (#firstworldproblems).  Only having creamy peanut butter in the house when you’re craving crunchy peanut butter is still a problem even if just slightly.  More difficult problems include relationship trouble, financial hardships and health and safety issues.  

For each problem there is a solution, or at least a pursuit of a solution.

For all the negatives that problems bring I think there are some important positives as well. 

One positive is the fact that problems provide purpose (a lot of alliteration going on right there).  When a problem arises, action has to be taken to solve it.  Essentially they give us things to do.  What would we do if there was nothing to do (Paradox)?  What would we do if there were no problems?  Think of it this way.  Firefighters fight fire, but if there ceased to be any fires they would have nothing to do.

Think of any profession and it is tied to solving a problem stemming from some need.  A doctor solves problems related to illness and injury because people have a need to be healthy.  An advertising executive creatively promotes products and services for particular companies which seek to fulfill some need for their customers.   

Problems that arise for you may give you purpose to solve them.  Your problems may give others purpose as well, and vice versa. 

When you look at the world this way, as a constant stream of problems and solutions of various magnitudes, things seem to make a little more sense. 

A second positive is the development that occurs when you face and respond to troubles.  Solving problems helps you grow and learn; it shapes you. 

The next time you face a problem just remember that it is a piece to the puzzle of life and contributes to the functioning of the world.  Embrace it, and solve it!

Boom!

What You Need To Know About Your Eyes

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Eyes are everywhere.  There are two of them atop us humans.  They somehow turn light into electro-chemical signals (I’m no scientist) that are interpreted by our brain to give us vision.  They allow us to see.  Sight is very valuable and it’s important to remember a few things about it (I’ll get to those later). 

This morning I had an eye exam at 8:15 AM.  I am a morning person (crazy I know, and I don’t drink coffee either) and decided that I wanted to schedule the appointment early in the day; I was surprised and delighted to hear that the office opens at 7:00 AM (yes, they’re crazy too).

I do look pretty handsome in my glasses, but I prefer contacts and needed an eye exam in order to purchase another supply of them.  After about twenty minutes of “Qs,” “Bs,” “Cs,” and “Ss” in the patients’ leather throne I was ready to go home with my brand new prescription.  Just as I was ready to slide out of the chair, I was offered the option of pupil dilation which would allow the doctor to most effectively inspect my eyes for any problems.  I thought about it for a moment, and then agreed.  A little discomfort in order to maintain good health is definitely worth it. 

After the doctor surveyed my eyes I was free to go.  There were no problems.  As I was leaving, the doctor said, “Did you bring sunglasses?”  I replied, “Why? Do I need them.”  He answered, “You might. You might.”  As he said that he pulled a rolled up piece of dark plastic out of what appeared to be a film canister (I thought Kodak learned their lesson already).  He handed me a pair of disposable sunglasses that didn’t have temple arms!  They just unroll and stick to your face. 

As I walked outside the sun was a little overbearing and I needed the disposable protection.  I was squinting until I put the glasses on.  With them I could have played a role in the Matrix, traveled back in time and replaced Tom Cruise in Top Gun, protected the President of America, or won an international poker tournament.  Instead, I just quietly hummed Cory Hart’s 1980s hit single, Sunglasses at Night, and drove home.

Do you see what I mean?

I thought about the slight blurriness and sensitivity that the dilation caused and realized that for the most part I take for granted the ability to see.  I thought about vision and I came up with these characteristics of and things to remember about sight:

Eye Contact Is Important
Have you ever gazed into someone’s eyes before?  In that moment you feel one of the deepest connections.  It is you and them.  The rest of the world is secondary.  Some people are uncomfortable with too much eye contact, but usually because it’s with someone they don’t know very well or don’t want to know very well.  When you make eye contact, you not only connect with sight, but with soul.  I feel that through the eyes you can see who a person is and they can see who you are (which is good unless your eyes are dilated and you come off as a demon or drug addict).  Remember to give the proper amount of attention, through eye contact, to the individuals you want to be closest to. 

Right before I wrote this post I was on my bike and passed a beautiful young woman walking in the opposite direction.  We made eye contact and smiled.  About five seconds after, I turned my head back to look again, and she was doing the same.  That’s called the mutual double-take or MDT!  I know that extra moment of eye contact sent a message of interest and created a deeper connection, even if just for a moment. 

The Eyes Don’t See Everything
Spin around 360 degrees with your eyes open and there are unlimited places for your eyes to wander.  There is a lot that you can see, but a lot goes unseen.  This can either be a good thing or a bad thing.  It is bad in the sense that others may not notice some things you want them to, like writing great blog posts.  Remember to adjust for this by drawing attention to those things; wisely choose the things you want noticed and the way in which you make them seen.  Also, like the others, you won’t see everything so it is important to be as cognizant as possible. 

On the other hand, the eyes’ failure to catch things can be an advantage.  Did I spill beer all over a lady a few days into my job at a new restaurant?  Yes.  Did a lot of people in the room see it?  No.  In that particular area of the restaurant there were more people that didn’t see it than did.  People I could have sworn saw it didn’t.  Knowing this helps you to accept mistakes and move on without worrying.  If by chance a lot of people do see you make a mistake it’ll be only a matter of minutes before their mind wanders to other thoughts.

Your Eyes Connect You To The World
Sight is one of the five senses.  It is literally one of the mediums that make you realize everything around you.  The world has a lot to offer so soak it all up.  Spend some extra time looking at the sky, landscapes, sunsets, artwork, architecture, people or whatever you want.  Look from new angles for new perspectives.  Use your eyes to discover. 

Appreciate sight and use it well!

Wink, bam!

Motivation by Visual Stimulation

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The other day I took a short drive to the local library and asked the librarian at the front desk where I could find The Great Gatsby.  She asked me who the author was, which puzzled me for a moment; I thought that kind of information was common knowledge for librarians.  Anyway, I responded with, "F. Scott Fitzgerald," and she led me to the hardcover version of the classic novel.  Within two days I had finished the book.  I'm the type of person that prefers movies over books although I do strive to read more, so reading a novel in such a short time is saying something.  It says that I was very motivated to read.       

The day before this library pick-up I had seen an advertisement for the upcoming Hollywood remake, The Great Gatsby, which will be starring Leonardo DiCaprio and Tobey Maguire.  I clicked on the image, which was laden with gold designs and “Gatsby” in fancy lettering.  I then watched the trailer for the film.  I was completely enthralled.  Seeing the vibrant images of the stylized 1920s, intense emotions on the characters faces, and glimpses of unfolding events made me very interested in not only the movie, but the story.  I have read and enjoyed the novel before, a few years ago, but I felt compelled to do it once again.  I had to go seek out the novel and read it.    

The powerful and thought provoking images motivated me by giving me a sense of the end result.  I knew the sorts of things the novel included and the type of experience I would have reading it.   

There have been a few other cases similar to this one, where I was motivated by images.  When I first saw images for the theatrical releases of both The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo and The Hunger Games I read the books within the week.

Another recent example unrelated to reading books (I’ve used a lot of those examples) would be my gardening venture.  I have recently planted some peanuts to grow my own plants.  I would most likely never have planted the peanuts had I not seen the images of peanut plants online.  Yes I searched for the images.  What can I say?  I love peanut butter!  I saw how feasible it is to grow them, and more importantly saw the resulting peanuts that grow beneath the soil.  I was intrigued.

How long before I can make peanut butter!?

If you have interest in something and can gain a sense of how something will be or how it will result then the motivation to act will follow.     

My interest in reading, and in peanuts (it sounds silly to be interested in peanuts) combined with the imagery that I encountered and sought out, led me to act. 

If you are looking for the motivation to do something then just look for powerful images or use your imagination to visualize your own ones that will push you to act. 

Another example, which is gaining a lot of popularity, is the social networking site, Pinterest, which is based on collections of images “pinned” by users; it contains a lot of motivating forces.  Whether you are interested in getting into shape, decorating your home, starting a garden, cooking, traveling, dressing nicely, playing sports etc., there are images throughout the site that can spark motivation to do those things!   

Find or create a motivating image to begin doing something that interests you!

Bam!

Baskets: Not Only For Easter, But Fitness Too

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As we age (this coming from a 21-year-old) our lives become busier and our time is tied up in many different activities; “activities” isn’t the best word to describe how the time is used though, considering it implies physical movement.  Our time is tied up mainly in mental pursuits.  Many people begin focusing on their work and spend countless hours each week physically inactive, hunched over their desks or in other life-draining positions.  The days of running around at recess, competing in sports, and actively “playing” in general have a tendency to slip away.  If an individual cannot set away time to partake in some sort of fun exercise, I feel sorry for them, but I believe they can still find ways to remain fit and active.

I am someone that takes physical fitness fairly seriously.  I try to make it into the gym at least two or three times a week, and I also run or bike a few times a week.  I know that as time goes on I will take on much more responsibility whether it be from work, from family, or any other facet of life that I have no power of foreseeing in the present.  With more responsibilities, carving out blocks of time for exercise will become more difficult.  I have realized this: 

Fitness is a lifestyle, not a trip to the gym. 

I’ve always heard this type of message, but only recently really thought about it.  Today I was shopping at my favorite grocery store… Wegmans!  In case you have never heard of it, a friend of mine, and fellow blogger, wrote a recent post about the magical grocery land.  Anyway, I walked in and realized that I only really needed about ten items or so, the essentials.  In choosing my “weapon of choice” in the battle through the aisles I decided on a basket rather than the large or small carts.  With each added item I could feel a little tension in my biceps, forearms, abs, and shoulders.  I was doing some light exercise!  When others weren’t looking I may have done a few curls and shrugs, no shame. 

It hit me that a little change like this in a very routine errand makes a positive difference in your overall fitness.  It might not help you reach maximum fitness goals in the way that an elliptical or set of free weights would, but small changes like this add up. 

I know that as I age I might not be able to fit in an hour or two at the gym as often as I’d like to, but that won’t stop me from maintaining an active lifestyle.  Making a bunch of small changes like this will be advantageous.

Some more minor changes that can aid fitness include:

• Parking your car at the back of parking lots to maximize walking distances
• Taking stairs over elevators (also walking up ‘down’ escalators if there is no crowd)
• Sitting on a fitness ball instead of a chair
• Standing as opposed to sitting when the opportunity presents itself

It is a matter of identifying things you do on a daily basis and figuring out how they can be done in a more physically active way without costing you too much of your time. 

I believe the other key to being fit is finding time for exercise.  If you have short amounts of time free, do a short workout, but if it is too difficult then these small changes are a step in the right direction. 

As I go into the future I’ll be working on maintaining time for exercise and making fit-changes.  My ultimate, long term fitness goal is to be able to run at least 2 miles straight and do around fifty push-ups when I am at the ripe old age of 80.

Be fit!  However you can!

Boom!

The Value of Handwritten Letters

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Yesterday I had a great surprise.

A hand written letter from one of my friends was waiting for me in my P.O. Box.  This is a friend that I haven't seen in many months, mainly because of the geographical distance between us.  She had planned on visiting me a few weekends ago, but some unfortunate events occurred which made the visit more suitable for another time.  Unable to visit, she sent me a handwritten letter to update me about things in her life and ask how I was doing.

I was really excited to see the surprise letter and even more excited to read it.  My friend could have easily contacted me via email, text, phone call, or through various social media channels.  Instead she chose the letter.  

A handwritten letter is a gesture that has great meaning and holds a lot of weight.  It reveals the effort that an individual is willing to put forth because of their respect or care for you.

The idea of handwritten letters or messages being more thoughtful and meaningful than other mediums is nothing new, but communication technology is growing exponentially and as each day passes the archaic practice of putting words on paper (recycled, of course) gains more power.  Anyone can communicate electronically, and everyone does, but writing by hand has been forgotten a bit and reclaiming it gives you a unique way to reach others.

If you want to make a bold statement, show someone you care, or stand out from the crowd then write a letter.  Put yourself in the shoes of the recipient.  When I do that I say, "Um yes!  Of course I want a handwritten letter.  The words on paper are like gold bricks carefully placed into an envelope-shaped treasure chest."  

It is a simple gesture that takes some time but means a lot.

Obviously some mediums are better than others in certain circumstances, but when the opportunity to write a letter arises, take it!

After I received the letter I responded with one of my own, and this blog post was hand written before typed.

Boom!  

Do You Have A Mission?

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What is the one thing that all organizations have in common?

They all serve some purpose.

This purpose is outlined in their respective mission statements.  These statements give each organization a focus by asserting a goal, or purpose and giving a brief description on the unique way in which the goal, or purpose will be reached.  The statement acts as a guidepost for action.

With a set mission statement, members of an organization know what they are working toward.

That is wonderful!

What about me as a PERSON though?

Have you ever wondered what you're doing and why, where your're going, and who you really are?  If you have never wondered these things, and just knew them, then you should write a book.  These questions are all related to your purpose.

A personal mission statement is something I think everyone should have, and review often.  It guides you, especially when you are unsure of things.

This past summer I sat down and constructed my own personal mission statement so that I could have something that guided me.  I look at it almost everyday and it brings everything into focus.  I recommend taking some time, and it does take some time, to carefully think about yourself and what you want and creating a mission statement.        

Mine is:

To live vibrantly, fearing nothing, exploring life's endless offerings with an open mind and heart, and embracing everything with a positive attitude.  To bring happiness to those I encounter, and maintain inner peace through moderation.

It is my approach to life.  It is my purpose, and way of living as a human.

Outline yours when you have some time; it will be worth it.

I'm not James Bond or Ethan Hunt, but I do have a mission.

You should too!

Track Your Everyday Accomplishments and Succeed In Interviews

Image Source: David Castillo Dominici

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Today, March 1st, just happens to be National Peanut Butter Lover's Day.  Peanut Butter Lovers.com will satisfy all of your celebration needs for today.  If you know me well enough then you know that I would easily be classified as a "Peanut Butter Lover," and I don't need a specific day to celebrate.  In fact, this past week I made my way through about 1 and a 1/2 jars of peanut butter.  Would I call that an accomplishment?  Yes.  Would I call that an accomplishment worth sharing with others?  Apparently yes considering I just did, but in truth no.  It is just a good segue into my blog post today.

Accomplishments.

Recently I have been preparing myself for the job market.  As a graduating senior I have been carefully crafting my resume, and drafting cover letters.  I have been applying online, and conversing with human resource representatives at various employers.  I have also been preparing myself for interviews.

While researching the interview process and common questions, I have found that very often interviewers will ask behavioral questions.  These are questions that require you to respond with answers explaining your past actions, and performance.  These questions usually start with:

•  Tell me about a time when.....
•  Describe your experience.....
•  Give me an example of when you demonstrated.....

These questions require you to know what you have done in different situations, be able to remember your actions, and express them well.

Unless it was something major you have done, or you have included the associated experience on your resume, it may be difficult to remember instances when you did some great things.

When preparing for interviews I find myself looking back at my course projects, work experience, and organizational involvement to pinpoint my "highlights."  This can take a lot of time if you are trying to thoroughly outline everything you did related to certain attributes or qualities that a potential employer may be looking for.

I have been working on that to have a breadth of examples fresh in my mind when answering various behavioral questions, but I have also begun to do something more productive.

I thought to myself, optimistically, and said, "I have accomplishments every day!"  At the end of every day I have been looking back and composing my "highlight reel."  Every day I am working with others on projects, facing challenges, and learning new things.  I actively think back to the day and write down my greatest accomplishments.

Very often we go through our days doing great things along the way, and they can be lost if we don't take some time to think about them.  Of course, the major accomplishments will be memorable, but the smaller ones are more personal and revealing.  Answering an interview question with a clear, concise, yet specific response will be very powerful, and memorable.

You should track your everyday accomplishments because:

• You'll gain a better understanding of yourself 
• You'll have a wider variety of examples showcasing your skills and attributes
• It will make you feel good, feel accomplished

Remember, you don't have to receive a physical award in order to realize an accomplishment.

Go out there and do great things!  (like eating a ton of peanut butter.....)

BAM!   

Wait Tables, Gain Valuable Skills

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Well it's Valentine's Day and couples everywhere will be celebrating their relationships and the deep, endless love that exists within them.

Okay, maybe that won't be the case for every couple today, but nonetheless there will be money spent on the occasion.  The commercialized holiday influences lovers to buy gifts for each other, and one of the more classic ones, besides little stuffed teddy bears and heart shaped candies, is dinner out on the town.

Over the past week I have been seeing an increased number of Facebook posts from the small restaurant I worked at this past summer, Questa Lasagna.  Check it out.  It is a wonderful place to dine.  The restaurant has been trying to attract all of the lovebirds to enjoy a fresh Italian cuisine on the most romantic day of the year.

Seeing the increased number of advertising messages had me thinking about my summer working as a waiter from May until August.  Considering the small size of the staff, yet large customer base, I was required to perform a multitude of tasks.  I thought about the wonderful experience I had, and the challenges that I overcame.  I believe that the demanding job helped me develop all of the skills necessary to be successful in nearly any position I will hold in the future.         

As I head into the "real-world," after securing my Bachelor's Degree, I find myself thinking about the experiences that have best suited me for making my pursuits in business that much easier.  My time spent in the restaurant tops the list of those experiences.


I highly recommend anyone looking to go into business, and not already too far into their career path, to consider a position waiting tables.

These are some of the skills I know I developed, and think anyone would in this position:

Communication
Working as a waiter forces you to constantly interact with customers.  You have to maintain a friendly atmosphere, listen to and understand customer needs, verbally explain the menu and specials, answer questions, and provide solutions.  On the other side of this is communication with the restaurant staff.  You need to be able to clearly tell the chef and cooking staff what the customer needs; you also need to listen to them regarding their needs from you.  A restaurant is an environment with endless communication, and the waitstaff holds much of the responsibility for understanding and acting on any given message.  It is like a game of telephone; you are communicating with two different parties, and are also the link between them.

Multitasking 
As a waiter or waitress you need to be able to do two things at once, maybe even three or four.  When you have four or five tables that you are responsible for, a lot comes with it.  With a full restaurant you are constantly greeting, seating, reciting specials, slightly socializing with customers, taking orders, bringing meals, answering phones, clearing dishes, asking questions, answering questions, watching, preparing checks, cashing out, and bussing and setting tables.  WOAH!  Your mind must always be working to think of the next thing to be done, with an ever changing list of priorities.  Very often the waitstaff needs to coordinate their efforts as well to make sure that the restaurant as a whole is served well.  You not only worry about your own responsibilities, but those of your co-workers too.

Stress Management
While you multitask like crazy it's not uncommon for some stress to set in.  Scratch that, a lot of stress sets in.  Since there is so much to do and so many people counting on you there is a lot of pressure.  You learn to take deep breaths and focus on the tasks one at a time while still being cognizant of everything else that needs to be done.  On one extremely busy, stress filled night I remember asking myself, "What's the worst that could happen if I just left right now?"  Don't worry, I didn't!  It was stressful, but I stuck with it and worked through with focus.

Preparation
My particular position required me to prepare some of the dishes, especially salads.  I had to "prepare for the apocalypse" if I wanted to make it through the night.  A good waiter or waitress will quickly learn that when they have time to prepare, they should prepare because it makes life a lot easier in the future, or in less than an hour when people start flooding through the door.  Also if you know that a large table of customers is coming in, you have to strategically plan their dining experience ahead of time to make it run smoothly.

Teamwork
In a restaurant, you work as part of a team with the other waitstaff and the kitchen.  Everyone counts on everyone else to complete their respective tasks, and pick up the slack when someone needs it.  Everyone has to be on the same page and know what is going on.  You have to be able to understand the others' needs, and communicate yours.  There are a lot of moving parts and you are one of them.

Sales
The best part about being part of the waitstaff is that you are working for tips.  The higher the bill, and the better the service, the higher the tip.  You have to treat each and every customer uniquely, and cater to their needs in a specific way.  You also try to add items on, by suggesting appetizers before their meals, or desserts after.  It is all about treating the customer well, and gaining their desire for certain dishes.  After a while, you begin to understand what works and how to approach different situations.  You foster a sales mindset.

Every restaurant is different, and this one required a lot from its waitstaff.

Work in a demanding atmosphere and you will see yourself adapting and growing to accomplish everything.  The skills you gain in this setting are so useful.

On a side note, having experience in the service industry at this level is great for those who want to explore related career options, or want to always have something to fall back on if need be.

Wait some tables!  

To All The Perfectionists

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What is one of your weaknesses?

I wouldn't advise answering "perfectionism" if you are asked this in a job interview; interviewers hear it all the time, like an overplayed Gaga song.  Nonetheless, perfectionism is a weakness, and if it is one of yours I hope you'd like to move past it.  

I have been a self-proclaimed perfectionist, and have heard others say the same about me.  Time after time I put forth great amounts of time and energy to complete tasks with a high level of quality.  Sometimes this strategy works, but other times it limits me.  I tend to take more time than necessary to do certain things, and often decide not to take on tasks because I know that even with the the time and energy I would put into them there stands a great chance that they might not end up the exact way that I'd like them to. 

When you move past the need to consistently perform at high levels and meet ridiculous standards you become more productive and will most likely produce higher quality work.  

I have outlined three strategies that I believe are helpful in breaking from the limitations of perfectionism.  

Prioritize your tasks

When it comes down to it, 80% of the things that you do during the day don't matter.  Okay, they matter in the sense that you do them, but regarding the quality by which you accomplish these tasks it makes very little difference.  The other 20% are things that require an extra amount of effort.  The next time you are doing something, categorize it into either the 80% or the 20% to know how much time it really needs; when actively categorizing the tasks it should be apparent which belong where, and if it requires more than 10 seconds to decide then it should be part of the 80%.

Go!  Forget about "ready" and "set"

Start something.  Make mistakes.  Deal with them.  Don't let the perfectionist mentality keep you from doing difficult things that you know will not end perfectly.  You wouldn't slowly creep into a freezing body of water if you wanted to get in; you would do a cannonball straight in.  My post on failure builds upon this idea.

View everything as a work in progress

When you begin looking at large tasks or sets of tasks, think of them as works in progress.  This takes your mind off of the end result, and gives you more motivation to put work in and you'll become more able to complete tasks.  With less pressure put on final outcomes you will do more work, and with a higher quality in the long run because you'll consistently be working on improvements as opposed to trying to be perfect the first time.

A great example of my effort to move past perfectionism was a few days ago when I set out to make my first video blog post, about perfectionism (foreshadowing).  I haven't had much experience with video, and I knew the end result would not meet my usual standards yet I set out to do it anyway.  After a few hours of hard work, due to some technical problems, the program wouldn't respond and everything had been lost.   I saw the video production as part of the 20%, began working on it right away without too much concern for the end result, and viewed it as something I would get better at with time and work.  I moved past the limitations of perfectionism.  I think it is definitely a lesson.  I could have not tried the video, and learned nothing, but instead I tried, and even though nothing resulted I was able to learn from it to do better in the future.  

There will be a video post eventually!  It won't be perfect either!